Consume My Feet

I WANT NEW SHOES!

I'm not even kidding you, I've been walking around my house like some battered, bruised and completely bashed up 85 year old women, who has never slipped her feet into some perfectly crafted beaut's called shoes!

I will admit, I like? correction, love to go out clubbing.
I will also admit, I do like to wear ridiculous 5 inch high heels... every time I go out, which at the moment ranges from once to twice a week!
Another confession... I sort of fancy myself when I wear them.

Fake tan + Black, patent, 5 inch heels + me being the slightly arrogant girl that I am = a good combo. I think. Lets not mention the student style cocktails that are added later on, which usually result in me falling flat on my face, or in fact ASS, in a pile on the floor, with my friends, laughing until I think I'm gunna pee! (Think?? Sometimes it happens!! sshh. It's only a little bit. I swear)
FYI student style is when you and your already pissed friends decide that half vodka, half cherryade, is the way forward... thus the pre-drinks, turn into the ONLY drinks your body is able to consume, and most bouncers think your barking mad!

I'm serious though, my nights out are in fact, hilarious! I love my friends, love meeting new ones and love love love dancing until my feet bleed!!

This, however, is the issue I am having. My feet always bleed after a night out! It ruins my fun and I simply can't take it. This is why, I want some new shoes! I can't be doing with my legs buckling under my weight, remember lots of food and alcohol on stilts when drunk means your technically heavier (I think... sort of made that up but it seems true), consequently flashing at random passers by, feeling like a total wang, having leg definition... and I mean properly muscly looking legs... I do not like this!!, and then the blisters and bruises that result from it!

Men don't have this problem!! I'd dance past 5 if it wasn't for these shoes! They are actually amazing, but they hurt so bad. This is why I need new ones.

Reasons for buying new, sexier, higher shoes than ever:
1. I like to think they won't hurt as much as the previous pair
2. They are sexy. Very.
3. They are the new 'it' trend, captured in a pair of shoes
4. I love them
5. They only cost about a million pounds

I don't actually need new shoes, this was just my vain attempt to convince myself I do so that I can head off to River Island and blow another £60 on some foot munchers! It didnt really work.

Dear Feet,
I'm v.v. sorry for the pain and pressure I force you to endure. However, this is only the beginning, so learn to deal with it.
K. Thanks, Bye!

Back soon for more tickings of my oh so teenage mind <3